Justice, in this life?
I think I’m a bit cynical. This topic has come up the past few days in conversation with friends. It is a topic that is discussed a lot between my kids and I.
How do you even begin to wrap your mind around the foolishness of some people? Foolishness that comes at a high price. Not for the foolish person, but for those they hurt. Tomorrow, at 12:30 pm, it will be 12 weeks since two state troopers showed up at my door to tell me that my husband was killed that morning in a head on collision on highway interstate 635. I’ve replayed that scene over and over in my mind. The utter horror that envelopes you, the initial unbelief, telling my children. I remember the pain on the young officers face as he tried to comfort me and my children…he was so very young..not much older than my oldest son.
As details came to light over the next few days we were told that the collision happened because a 55-year-old man was going down the highway the wrong way. It is still unknown how or why he got on the highway going the wrong way. We do know that he is a recovering alcoholic of 30 years. He admitted to having a drink that morning before he drove. He admitted that he went against the advice of his doctor to not drive. He has several DUI’s on his license. He is also a very sick man due to his alcoholism so he is on heavy medication.
It seems terribly unfair that he is now enjoying the comfort of his home and family while we try to patch our lives back together without our husband and father. No, wait..it IS unfair. It’s unfair that justice will probably not be meted out enough to help sooth our pain.
So as I sit at the supper table with my children, night after night, and this topic comes up I struggle with what to say. As I look at their faces and see their hurt, anger and want for justice I can’t say that if you looked at me you wouldn’t see the same thing.
I can try to spin it in a “spiritual way” and say “well, I’m sure he’s hurting too” or “lets not forget about his family and what they might be going through” or “he might not be a believer”..but it all feels false. I mean really, who cares what he’s going through, he’s alive for his family right? It’s a bit difficult to squeeze out any sympathy for the “bad guy”..and I’m not sure we are obligated to. But we ARE obligated to forgive.
So we talk about forgiveness and what that looks like toward someone who killed their Dad. We’ve talked about how much Christ has forgiven us. We forgive because we have been forgiven. What about justice? I believe we do have the freedom to pursue some sort of justice in this country, however discouraging that may be. It’s what we have for now. Anything the justice system here metes out will not be near enough to compensate for my husband’s life. I’ve tried to encourage my children and myself with the truth of Gods Word, that some day all wrongs will be made right. (Ecc 3:17/I Cor 15; Rev 21..the passages are just too numerous to list of the hope that we have in God’s court some day.)
So, justice in this life? no, that’s not where my hope lies.
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