My ways…

…are higher declares the Lord Isaiah 55:8-9

Finally….I guess

Our case was not dismissed.  That’s a good thing.  This long-awaited day was a hard one.

Neither my children or I were prepared for the stuff we would hear in court yesterday.  So difficult.  As I sat there hearing testimony, it was hard to stem the anger.  Why do we have to relive this?  Why do we have to hear that our husband and Dad possibly was alert and suffered the last moments of his life without any of us there?  So not fair. Not fair that the man who caused the accident was sitting in the courtroom alive and well, seemingly not affected at all by the court proceedings.

I’ll own it.  It’s hard to be an example to my kids of forgiveness and mercy.  I’m angry.  Really angry. As a mom it infuriates me that I have to watch my kids suffer even more.  Just when we were seeing the light at the end of the tunnel in our grief.  I’m angry at the Justice system that protects the criminal.

And then this morning I read about the Crucifixion.  Our injustice is nothing.  Good perspective for me to gain. Being like Christ in all of this is one of the hardest things I’ve probably ever had to do in my Christian life.  The sense of protection for my children is overwhelming.  I want it over.  We want to put this behind us.  We NEED to move on.

My children are watching me (like children do).  They are taking their cues from me.  They are taking their cues from friends and family.  Some of the comments they made yesterday when we got home of what others had said to them warmed my heart.  You all have no idea the impact you have on them. Thank you for that.

I was so humbled at the amount of support we received from family and friends yesterday.  Not sure what I would have done without all of you there.  I hope Chris can see that we are cared for.

I do not know what the Lord has planned in all of this.  But I do know that we are to bring him glory. Justice is part of bringing Him glory.  He protects His own and that comforts me.

And you have seen all that the LORD your God has done to all these nations for your sake, for it is the LORD your God who has fought for you.

Joshua 23:3

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