My ways…

…are higher declares the Lord Isaiah 55:8-9

“I, the Lord, love justice….” Psalm 61

If God loves justice, why does it seem like we live in a world without justice?

As Chris’s trial looms ever closer the feelings of the injustice of it all can be overwhelming. “It’s not fair” is a mantra in my head some days.

Being created in the image of God, we, as humans long for moral justice to prevail and are outraged when we see injustice around us. Why do we seek justice for crimes? It’s in our DNA.

I’m obviously not the first to ask this question…just read the Psalms.  Asaph asking the age-old question…”why do the wicked seem to prosper?” (Psalm 73) Asaph’s theology does not seem to match his experience. at all. Until you get to the end of the Psalm and he realizes that in the scope of eternity the wicked do not prosper. They are without God.

The range of emotions I have felt for the man who killed Chris is wide. From the moment I heard the Sheriffs words “I’m sorry ma’am, there’s been an accident” to now, 2 years later.

Initially, my first feelings were to forgive. After all, it was an accident right? there would be an apology, would be hard, but I would forgive. That’s what Chris would want me do. In fact, all the News channels had the giant headlines “WIDOW FORGIVES….” As the months went by, and no apology came, no remorse was evident, and a pre trial revealed a man who seemed ambivalent towards the family whose lives he had ruined….I wanted to grab those headlines back.

Job, Jeremiah, David and Asaph’s feelings of anger, bitterness and frustration over the seemingly unfairness of life, mirror mine. Why does the system protect the criminal? Why do my children have to suffer at the hands of someone so irresponsible? Same questions, different time.

We all have a built-in desire for justice, but I wonder if we really understood justice biblically,  if that would be what we really wanted? Is it not true that justice is delayed for our benefit? The world cries “It’s not fair!” and we long for justice. But what we should be longing for is mercy.

So as the trial approaches I want to remember that forgiveness is not about me but about being Christ-like.  I want to remember that I have been justified far beyond what I deserve. I want to look at this trial from an eternal perspective, and I want to show just a little bit of the mercy that has been shown to me.  Do I want some justice here to ease the pain of suffering? I do. But in light of eternity my perspective on that is changing.

He has told you, O man, what is good;
    and what does the Lord require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
    and to walk humbly with your God.

Micah 6:8




  1. Praying for you and your family!!!

  2. Angela

    Holding all of you in prayer, Nicole.

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